No title for nothing

I haven't felt inspired lately which is why I haven't written. Don't you just hate when that happens? I feel like I've been stuck in an existentialist novel where every day is the same and nothing matters. What if that really was the reality of life? I often ponder whether anything I do attaches itself to meaning or purpose. Thoughts like that are bittersweet, I suppose.

But today is different. I felt inspired by a rather different muse: Dane Cook. Yes, the comedian. I was surfing his Twitter page when I came across something rather poignant. He tweeted, "Time does not heal all wounds. In fact, sometimes time is the wound."

There was a full-blown war with some of my best friends a couple weekends ago, which resulted in us not speaking for a week. It was the longest I'd gone without speaking to all four of them. Somehow, even though I apologized and moved on myself, they didn't. More time went by and I found myself caring less and occupying myself with things that didn't involve them. Important events happened and I didn't feel the need to tell any of them. Time may have healed the surface wound, but mysteriously grew deeper as time passed.

I think Dane is right. When relationships with significant others end, it's not until much later when we realize how hurt we are. Crying about something when it happens is an ephemeral emotion, but ruminating about something weeks or months later is when you really feel the scar.

I don't know where I was going with this. I just wish it weren't true.

-Penny Lane